Vaginal Penetration Of An Amelus With A Musty Carrot / Teen Pussy Fucker – Split CD (2014)

July 24, 2014

Wow! Now isn’t the name of this band a mouthful? It’s almost as thick and penetrating (that’s what she said!) as their ultra-chunky death metal / goregrind crossover sound. Austria’s VxPxOxAxAxWxAxMxC pack one hell of a groovy punch, something that is completely evident on this sick little split CD. Boasting one of the nastiest programmed snare sounds ever, the band chug and groove through 4 apotemnophiliac hymns of gargling gore destruction, my favourites being “Baptized In Clammy Scat” and the gorgeously-titled “Mucus Of A Giant Anal Papilla”. Sexy.

Sharing this disc with the Amelus Boys are long-running cyber/gore/porngrind maniac(s) Teen Pussy Fucker. This questionably offensive outfit, along with sister band Pigtails, have been around since the early Myspace days, maybe even sooner, and have been spreading the groovy porno vibe all of this time. Unfortunately, alongside VxPxOxAxAxWxAxMxC’s polished and enormously heavy studio sound, Teen Pussy Fucker’s bedroom-grind sound initially sounds a bit flat. I’m under no illusion that a lot of this stuff is produced this way, it’s just alongside top quality studio quality tracks, it can take a while for your ears to adjust. Teen Pussy Fucker’s material here comes on a bit like GUT vocals meeting CBT’s grooves, and a drum machine. Dodgy song titles are the order of the day (“I Like Your Pussy Shaved ‘Cause That Makes You Look Underage”, “Paedophilic Love”) but it comes part and parcel with these genres so what can you do… (2020 edit: this shit is absolutely not cool at all, fuckin’ weirdos)

All in all a pretty good fuckin’ split, finally glad to own some TxPxF / Pigtails material after all these years, but the Amelus Boys definitely take the crown here! This CD was released earlier this year on Kaotoxin Records.